Country Blah Day

Oh sure, you think it's all daisies & sunshine, this life in the country. Some days are like that, true enough. Many days are full of more beauty than my soul can seem to bear. But more are the days like today. It's too quiet. The dogs stare at me, but they don't say anything. The chickens rush the front door every time I open it. I spill sunflower seeds all over the dining room; they bounce across the wood floor like insane beetles. There are too many of them; I am outnumbered. I ignore them for a few minutes, suddenly overwhelmed. Bored, I've begun reading my 9 year old granddaughter's book she left here at Easter. I am 44 pages into "Diary of a Wimpy Kid," which is actually much more absorbing than one would imagine. I accidentally step in chicken poop when unloading the groceries. I hear what sounds like a cougar running down the length of the roof (I know from experience it's just one of my cats) but it startles me anyway. I race outside to look at the roof just in case it IS a cougar. Fortunately, it's just Sweetie Boy, or I'd be laying mangled in my driveway right now instead of writing this. Two of my cats get mad at one another & rip each other's fur out in a fight I have to break up to end. The dogs are staring at me again. I think they secretly plot my demise. I wonder about my family, my children & their lives, my grandchildren & their futures. I hope everyone is happy, & wonder if I'm to blame if they aren't. I find myself missing my legs; my health & strength were so dependent upon them. Ugh! The quiet is deafening. Time for me to quit dwelling on it and fill it up. Crank up the music, Mother Nature is driving me mad! Jasmine iced tea in hand, music drifting thru the windows, I take a short walk in the sun with my dogs. I think maybe that's why they've been staring at me all along.